Another Reason I’ll Soon Join John Wimber As An Exiled Quaker

So today was a day of firsts at church:

  • Jason, Judah, and I had our first picture taken for the directory.
  • And I got the picture taken voluntarily! (Yes, Mom: voluntarily. Its crazy what changes come about after birthing a person).
  • I worked in the nursery. All parents get to watch kids at least once a quarter. Initially, I was going to go home while Jason did duty, but I knew that at home we had a dishwasher ready to be installed, and the church had a nursery where I could entertain Judah in a tool-free environment.
  • I got to watch Judah play with a friends kid who is two months older than Judah but is a wisp of a child next to my tank: I hope hes not bruised.
  • Im going to get to run a dishwasher tonight (i.e. there was a successful installation of an appliance in my home – something that didnt happen often in my native home).
  • And, I got the attention of all of second service directed at me as my pastor outed me for having a blog (bet you thought you were in the clear, huh, Gregg. Sorry – Im German, Irish, *and* Scottish: were stubborn, vindictive folks – fun, but with a taint). 🙂

Anyone from NFC: greetings! Feel free to look around. I promise you: this blog isnt all critiquing Sunday morning service as *some* people implied – I do have a few other thoughts rolling around in my head . . . like critiquing Yearly Meeting sessions. 🙂 🙂

This outing got me in such a fluster that I missed a lot of the service because my internal blogger started writing with a fury: justifications, excuses. You can find those on my Xanga, along with a pretty picture of my pastor (remember that aforementioned vindictive thing?). I also walked into a pew and banged my knee up pretty well while trying to make a smooth exit to run to the bathroom – yeah, so much for being anonymous in the balcony.

See, my pastor was introducing some folks who were going to share about a short term mission trip they took to Nicaragua, and he kept calling them by the wrong last name: I know one was a maiden name, not sure about the other. If I dont remember much of the service, how do I know they went to Nicaragua, pray tell? Because he kept wanting to call it Guatemala, and I thought that was funny.

Which is what got me in trouble in the first place – the whole thinking his “goofs” are funny bit – , as he pointed to me and my husband in our balcony Seats of Anonymity, and told the congregation that we had weblogs that chronicled everything that he said incorrectly. The entire congregation: ack.

First of all: this blog is called Aj Schwanz – me, its all about me!! Me me me!! Second of all, Gregg preached one of my most transformation-causing messages, talking about how God doesnt delete the bad stuff but rather transforms it into the best stuff ever. And so, I appreciate transforming what he thinks is bad stuff into great object lessons for me (me me me). 🙂

So, this morning got me thinking about how hard it is to change, especially under stress – we revert back to old and comfortable ways. Case in point: referring to a person whos been married for a while by her maiden name. Ive done that a lot – I get flustered on the phone and introduce myself by my former last name: it just slips out. I wonder what it takes for Christ to truly change me, to get rid of that old nature? Is it a constant focusing on him, like *all the time*? Does it become a habit? What happens when I get under stress? How can I turn to Him rather than reverting back to old stuff?

Just some questions to ponder . . . and a pastor to pester (you were wrong: I didnt just blog about it – I did it *twice*!! Dont mess with the German/Scotch/Irish!). 🙂

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